You're putting me on what!!
...Zoloft. The concerta made me batty. i went to the doctor on Monday and my telling him how loopy i was feeling -- angry, sad, depressed, irritable, moody, schmucky, etc. -- he decided that a) I shouldn't be on stimulants, and 2) I should move up tp a an SSRI. Now SSRI's are scary. The list of side-effects is longer than my arm and the descriptions get scarier as you move down the list. I'm not going to take it. I haven't filled the prescription and I'm waiting for the Dr. to return my call about my decison. It occurred to me, when I went to a meeting immediately after seeing the Dr. that i'm not out of control, i can function, and suprise -- when I'm in a meeting, I'm fine. i'm better than fine. i'm the myself that i like to be when I'm not depressed. This happened to me all shabbos. I interacted wonderfully with guests, with people i met later that day. No doubt, that morning in shul i was losing it and picked up and left the moemnt I could. But then I swallowed a bunch of concertas on Friday. I'm positive the concerta is what sets me off. There is no question that i have issues with depression. But I believe the Wellbutrin has at least been keeping me even. Going to Zoloft will not end well. And it isn't necessary. I suspect the doctor is being "Mr. Fix-it" and chagning strategy depending on the way I feel when I'm in his office. I don't understand why he doesn't see the clear connection between the concerta and my heightened state of depression. I'm not feeling depressed today, but i started the day on a high note and it just went downhill as the hours passed with the same projects sitting on my desk going uncompleted. now it's 5:25 and the two things I promised two different clients are still no complete. The phone call i promised to make yesterday still hasn't been made and the bills that need to be paid by tomorrow are still sitting here. what did i do today? Who knows. But ask me how many times I checked my email....how long I was websurfing....how long I was talking to irritating clients on the phone...how many papers I shuffled around my desk. The answer is: enough to waste the entire day. i'm not as depressed the last two days. The meeting broke my fund and it's been smooth sailing since then. The quesiton of course is when will be back. More on that next post. But trust me, I do not plan to be on Zoloft by then.
BTW, I'd love toknow what people's experiences with Zoloft have been. Either leave a comment or email me at addingyears@gmail.com Thanks!!
BTW, I'd love toknow what people's experiences with Zoloft have been. Either leave a comment or email me at addingyears@gmail.com Thanks!!
posted by addingyears at 5:21 PM
3 Comments:
full disclosure, if you read below, i wasn't so cool about taking the wellbutrin either. I'm really unsettled about all this. I started out with a visit to a psychiatrist on the recomendation of a friend. Here I learned I have ADD, which led to learning that my reliably inconsistant mood swings are actually depression, which lead to the possibility that I have a mood disorder. This is not to say that none of the above is true. But my reluctance comes from my sense that this is all too much, too soon.
Would you tell me about your 500 lb rock? You can email me if you'd like: addingyears@gmail.com.
My suggestion is see a psychotherapist. Yes they are way more expensive than a typical psychologist, but their goal isn't to medicate forever. Their aim is to help you to function better on your own.
Also, if you don't feel comfortable discussing your qualms about medication with your doctor you may need a different one, or try a little harder (I'm not sure if you did that or not).
A few months ago, I finally put 2 and 2 together and realized that I had ADD. I still haven't been to a mental health professional to get an official diagnosis (and thus, have not yet entered the world of medication), but the writing is clearly on the wall. A startlingly large amount of what you've written about your struggles applies to me, as well, and I look forward to following your journey on your blog, as I grapple with my own internal demons.
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